i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Everything about him screamed your future.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
