You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
