dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
