Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
If that was your dad, he is hot
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
