She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
