I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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