Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
