You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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