My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
