My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
