Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Randomize
