party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
