Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
