we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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