margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
The struggles of a small town man whore
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
