Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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