I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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