There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Randomize
