You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
