Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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