Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
