I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I have already put on my inside pants.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize