Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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