I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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