I love having hate sex.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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