Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
