how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
They have beer where we have blood.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
