i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
