Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
It's no shave November. This is our time.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
