Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
