It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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