Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
