On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
