college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize