I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
