I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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