So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
