Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
