Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
