Soap is not a condiment
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
