I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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