i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I don't deserve a penis
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
