whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
