I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I'm sobbing to NWA
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
