ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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