well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Randomize
