I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
