He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
