I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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