We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
this hospital has no fireball
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
